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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Don't live your life like a movie's LiveJournal:

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    Saturday, June 27th, 2009
    7:58 pm
    JUST HAD THE BEST WEEKEND OF MY LIFE.
    5:09 pm
    I fucking hate drama
    Saturday, May 16th, 2009
    6:07 am
    I have no sense of time and place anymore.
    Everything revolves around "what will happen next"?

    I still see you as the love of my life.

    Thats why im killing myself to be your everything.

    Hitting my 5th night of drinking and im sitting on your lounge with my arm around you sharing a slice of pizza.
    And i think its enough

    For now.

    So ill still do these things with you.

    Its substance abuse but i dont care.

    Cus im happy and nothing is bringing me down.
    Wednesday, May 13th, 2009
    8:37 pm
    Failed my P's.
    Its what all the cool kids do the first time round.
    Sunday, May 10th, 2009
    7:02 pm
    Pot.Pills.Alcohol.4am.200km/hr

    You say gas?

    I say no.

    Im not stupid.

    Im lying to your face and you know it.

    Just say so.

    Ill continue in spite of you.
    Friday, May 1st, 2009
    2:51 am
    I gave you a big hug and told you not worry.
    I know that you trust me and you tell me all your problems.
    You said i make sense of whats going on in your mind.
    We talked about her jealousy of me.
    And i remembered our previous conversation 
    You told me not to be embarressed of our history.
    I told you she should trust me I wouldnt go there again.
    Not now that were such good friends.
    But she came into the room and you went silent.
    She asked whats wrong and you said nothing.

    Should i be worried?

    Now im caught up in a wierd friendship with her ex.
    she told me if i did anything she would never speak to me again.
    I told you about it and you didnt agree with her feelings.
    You said i should do whats right.
    And you trust i wouldnt hurt anyones feelings.

    I wish i could hear your thoughts.
    Or atleast make sense of my own.
    Thursday, April 30th, 2009
    10:52 pm
    BLAH FUCKIN BLAH BLAH.

    i have great hair.
    Tuesday, March 31st, 2009
    2:00 am
    So ive had an utter shit few months..
    possibly the worst ever.

    hey im a rebel.
    or a complete fuckwit.
    lock in B eddie

    wahhhh fucking hoooo


    on the plus side i love my job.
    even though i work with a fuckface who makes me relive highschool drama everyday.

    And to top it all off now they are planning to get married.

    I mean come on fuck ya give me a break.


    hmm..
    i feel like you now.
    its really gay.
    Friday, March 20th, 2009
    1:37 pm
    i love that my boss knows when im upset.
    she tells me to smile and thinks of a nickname for me.
    I am now called rosie (middle name is rose and i go red from most of the conversations that happen during the day).
    i love my workmates.

    I miss my friend.
    Monday, March 9th, 2009
    3:53 pm
    Ok so here it is.Ill try and be as nice as possible.


    Dear ellen your a cunt.
    I hate you a little bit for leaving me.
    But i know that by leaving you will make yourself much happier then anyone or anything in this town could.
    Im going to miss the sunday/monday nights and random pub greetings we have.
    I dont think ill ever have a friendship like ours ever again... and i know your not dying or anything but once you leave things wont be the same.
    Maybe ill just glue you to the road like army men and you will never leave.

    I dont really know what to say but i love you alot and i hope you get everything you want out of life.

    You have been my dr phil/oprah/sister/best and most annoying friend and ill miss you terribly.

    stay rad.
    LOVE

    ps) Im dooooowwwwwnnnn patricia
    Wednesday, March 4th, 2009
    3:36 pm
    Im happy.
    Tuesday, February 10th, 2009
    4:22 pm
    i feel like i cant be free.
    Kills me to realise that a wink can make me just as happy as all the times i was alone with you.
    Same feeling.
    Same rejection.
    Scares me alot that you have this power.
    I dont want to be a fool for you.
    I dont want to be used but the idea of nothing seems so much worse.
    Pain can be a gift sometimes.
    Its just me doing a DIY heartbreak.

    Fuck you for giving me attention.
    Just hate me to my face already









    I think maybe im falling apart a bit.
    Wednesday, February 4th, 2009
    3:52 pm
    i have  nothing to say anymore.
    im blank and boring.

    sorry.
    Monday, November 17th, 2008
    3:18 pm
    In between the mass of heartbreak,pain,loss,hating,drama,crying,bitching and lying that seems to happen constantly in tamworth a beautiful wedding took place and Mr and Mrs Mulligan were introduced to the world.

    I saw Zoe go from the quiet little girl who i met the first day of high school orientation grow into the confident beautiful mother she is today.
    The kid i laughed with,cried with and had nothing but good times with.
    Some of the best memories i have of zo are the time i made her swear for the first time and she kept saying mother fucker.
    When she was 7 months pregnant and used string to keep her pants up and had a cardboard car over her shoulders and walked up and down the driveway acting like a car.
    When she made me touch her stomach and i was to scared to push hard so she slammed my fingers into her stomach and i felt baileys something.. still not sure what it was.
    So many memories i could share with everyone but really the best memory i have happened recently and that was when zoe told me she would run away to california with me and we would get married ( after she admitted she loved that she had a friend that wasnt straight)..
    This happened the night of her wedding.It made me realise that moments dont change people. Having a baby didnt change zoe,getting married didnt change zoe.It just made her a better person.

    And as far as im concerned michael hasnt changed a bit either. He is still the funny sleazy guy he always has been, but these days he is dad and husband before anything else.
    I love them together they make the perfect couple.

    Bailey wore a little suit and danced with me and then made out with a balloon that had a face drawn on it. At  2 yrs old the kid breaks my heart.
    Jess asked him to marry her and he laughed at her.
    I love that little fella more then words can say.
    Its a wierd feeling when I look at him and remember the 9 months that we played with zoes stomach and called him "jimmy" .
    I remember the moment she told us she was pregnant and i knew from that day on id help her as much as i could and that meant being her body guard,personal assistant and most of all just her friend who didnt treat her any different.
    Most days we wouldnt even talk about her being pregnant because to me she was the same zoe id always known.
    I remember the first time i saw Bailey. He was a hairy little thing wrapped up in a little blanket and i had a little tear when i held him for the first time. That was my best mates son. Her little "jimmy" in the flesh.

    Now when i see him he remembers the dance i taught him,He knows the importance of a courtesy laugh,He lets me help him put on his shoes,he shares my drinks..,He just is the most amazing thing ever really.

    Times get tough and friends fight. But i can safely say that i will be friends with Mr and Mrs Mulligan for as long as i live. They are wonderful people and im just blessed to know them let alone be in their life and get to enjoy being around Bailey and seeing him grow.
    I just hope they know how much they mean to me.
    Wednesday, November 12th, 2008
    3:12 pm
    So i gave way to a grin because i knew the alternative would be to hard to handle.
    Why do you play games with me?
    Why do you make it hard for me to love you?
    All i really wanted to hear you say is that im not yours and i never will be.

    I just want to be someones hero.


    I want you to stop telling me ive changed and just accept that people grow up.
    Im not wandering after you like a lost dog anymore and you cant accept it.
    I only want to surround myself with friends who respect me.
    Not ones that will ditch me the second something better comes along.
    I was the greatest fan of your life.
    Now i look at you and feel nothing.
    Thursday, October 30th, 2008
    3:06 pm
    All because of a pretty face.
    I ve spent all day wondering why i think im in love with you.
    I dont want to be in love with you.


    Ive done lots of bad things in the past couple of months that i said i would never do.
    I betrayed a friend.
    I left a sister on her own
    I did nothing to help a friend in need.
    I let myself fall back into the old routine of acting like things didnt matter to me.


    So ill wait and hope for what we had.
    Maybe you will see that im not the enemy and a long time ago i was the only person who had your back.
    I was there for you.
    But when i needed you the most you told me to get over it.
    Im just looking for what we were.
    I dont want anything else.
    I never changed who i was,I just owned up.

    Everyone wants to hide their secrets but im not hiding anymore and if this isnt what you want to hear then dont listen.
    Walk away.
    Make it easy for me.
    Wednesday, October 29th, 2008
    2:56 pm
    Im not a bad person and i wont let someone elses beliefs hurt my feelings.
    I am who i am.
    Your just a cunt.
    Tuesday, October 28th, 2008
    2:46 pm
    Read more... )

    yeah!
    Friday, October 17th, 2008
    3:07 pm
    "Dont be offended by this but you look like a dyke."

    Yeah new haircut radness.
    Friday, October 10th, 2008
    3:14 pm
    -I have a heartfelt desire to be more like you.
    -I want you to notice me.
    -I want you to leave me alone.
    -I want to be your friend but you have to leave the drama out of it.
    -I want to admit my feelings for you.
    -I want you to want to be with me.
    -I want you to stop blaming me for everything.
    -I want us to be like we used to be.
    -I want you to admit your wrong.
    -I want you to talk to me.
    -I want to know whats going on with you.
    -I want to be there for you but i cant.
    -I want you to stop relying on me for everything.
    -I want to leave but i need to stay.
    -I want us to be friends again.
    -I want you to grow up.
    -I want what i cant have,
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